My children live pretty self directed existences.  They have a lot of freedom to choose the things they want to do and when they want to do them.  The only things I insist on is that they help around the house when I ask them to (which is occasionally accomplished without a lot of yelling from both sides), happily go on whatever adventure I have planned for the day, spend time reading every day, and do math and French, which is done on the computer.

Over the summer I have kept a subtle eye on how they use their educational computer time (they believe I am oblivious).  I learned that they were using their time wandering through the Internet, tweaking the way their user looks, watching videos, looking up cute pictures, with occasional forays into what they were supposed to be doing.  After the ‘You are only hurting yourself’ conversation with each of them, I let them understand that their educational time on the computer would now be accompanied by a shoulder angel…me.  I would no longer buzz around in the background accomplishing various and sundry things.  I would now be sitting just behind them, for encouragement, aid, and reference.  That proclamation was not met with enthusiasm.

I have spent much of the last two weeks being growled, cried, and yelled at.  I have been told, very reasonably, that my attendance is not necessary.  When that failed to prompt my departure, things rapidly deteriorated to terse words and some dramatic stormy departures (not by me).  The attempts to discourage me from my perch continue.  Little do they know that I will not be dissuaded from my present course of action, even though I am not getting as much done, and there are other things that require my attention.  The reason for my fortitude is the results.  In two weeks their time on task (and not the amount of time on the computer) has doubled, almost tripled.  Although I do think some of the skills that are in their math program are as useless as my kids inform me they are, I am pushing for the ‘ah-ha’ moments when confusion transforms into understanding.  I keep telling them they have the ability to learn anything they want, but sometimes you have to work your way through stuff that you don’t see the value in to get there.

Maybe not so totalitarian.  I think I will stick with supreme benevolent dictator.

(My son, who was listening to me read this aloud to myself, said, “It makes you sound so sage, when actually your not.”  I tell you, I do this for the love.)