There are times that things confound me.

I have been blessed with little boobs.  Yes, it is a blessing.  Despite what popular culture wants us to believe, large breasts are a challenge.  I have met well endowed women who suffered from back problems, are challenged to find clothing that fits well, and have bra straps creating grooves in their shoulders from the weight of their breasts.  My breasts have worked as they were evolved to do, and I have never had to experience someone talking to my chest instead of my face.

I am not a shopper.  Actually, I abhor most shopping.  I become a wee bit grumpy when faced with the prospect of shopping for clothes, but when faced with having to bra shop, I turn into somewhat of an ogre.  My biggest challenge is trying to find a plain bra.  Lace is scratchy.  Underwire digs in.  I don’t want my bra to have boobs for me.  My breasts, in my opinion, don’t need to be fluffed, not because they are pert and closer to my chin than my belly button, but because I don’t think my breasts need to lie.  For me, a bra is for comfort.  Bouncing breast are uncomfortable.  The bouncing hurts.  If bra-less-ness causes me pain I cannot imagine what it does to someone more equipped. Unfettered breasts also move independently of each other.   This can be visually distracting and not always in an appealing way.

What confounds me is this: why it is so hard to find a plain bra?  I cannot be the only one that finds the bells and whistles that seem chronic in bra design uncomfortable and unnecessary.  Lingerie comes with descriptors of feeling ‘pretty’ and ‘sexy’.  I am thinking the small print is ‘itchy’, ‘pinched’, ‘artificial’, and ‘bound’.   I am not saying bras can’t be fun.  It would be lovely if fun (colours, patterns, shapes) could be had without the sacrifice of comfort.  I also want to know why change room mirrors are always so evil…